Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Someday I feel very much like Bridget Jones

Weight...probably the same.
Somedays I feel very much like Bridget Jones.
A little overweight and highly scatterbrained.
I like to think it's because creative people often
lack skills in other uminportant areas such as common
sense and organizational skills. Although I am
not single I am also not married and my boyfriend
although wonderful does not see this step forward as at
all important. This lack of wanting the same thing
I do gives me a self confidence issue. Is this why
I over eat? Did I just stop trying? Did I have a case of
fight or flight and I flew? What are your thoughts?

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Day 10: Smoking and Drinking

Okay so this entry may not be weight loss related but since I have a glass of very good wine in front of my I thought I would talk about drinking and smoking.

It's not like I wake up and think that a cigg or two sound good. Actually quite the opposite. The thought of smoking a cig in general grosses me out. It smells, it's unattractive...blah blah. It's not until I have at least three drinks that I crave one, I want one, and I will kill close family members to get one.

I'm not just the 'I will get drunk and smoke a cig type'. I am the 'I'm going to have a few drinks and light one with the other until I am grossed out by myself'. I mean I can go weeks and weeks without one. However, when I try to explain that to someone who doesn't understand they argue with me and label me a smoker. So what makes a smoker? Am I the disgusting person that I label and judge on a daily basis?

Weigh in on this ladies. Let me hear what you think.

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Day 9: Cramps and Food

I have massive cramps today. This could also be why when I found out that a family friend who I have known since he was four, got engaged last night, I bursted into tears. Maybe I just didn't expect a kid who is 6 years younger than me to be taking that step before me. I am starting to feel like an old maid. So I'm bummed today. I'm not going to apologize for the way I feel because I cannot help it.

I had half a brownie carmel thing last night. More soup for dinner. Didn't run at all. I want to work on my novel but I'm seriously starting to abhore it.

Love,

Debbie Downer

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Day 8: Christmas Cookies Are The Devil

We did not receive just one gladeware container full of cookies from my boyfriends mother but FOUR! Then a co-worker of mine gave me an entire shirt box full of the assorted homemade cookies that she made over the weekend. Does everyone want me to fail? I fell off the wagon last night and after I had a bowl of low-fat no cheese no bread onion soup...I had three sugar cookies...and a brownie. Today I am not chastising myself for it and will start anew. I didn't eat breakfast this morning because my stomach hurts from the treats and I feel a little nauseous. ugh.

Today after work I will be starting a new organization cleansing at home. My closet is a disaster. My home is always immaculate but my closet seems to be a dumping ground for everything I feel I will get to later. And since we are having people over on Christmas Eve and I don't want my home tour to turn into an episode of 'Horders', I will start the excavating of my closet.

Does anyone have any great slow cooker recipes? I haven't used mine in ages and I'm getting the itch. Post them on here and I will let you know if and when I make it and how it came out.

Pounds Lost: NOT GETTING ON THE SCALE UNTIL I FEEL LIKE I ACTUALLY DID A GOOD JOB.

Sooooo......am I skinny yet? lol

Monday, December 14, 2009

Day 7: Stupid Fun Weekend

So on Friday night my boyfriend and I attended a birthday celebration and as far as eating goes, I didn't do bad at all. As far as drinking goes...let's just say it was a long night.

On Saturday we took our dog Tank out on our boat for the first time. We bought him a life jacket. He loved it sooo much.

On Sunday we invited friends of our out on the boat and once again I was drinking...Beer! ALL DAY!!! Bad me! I really need to get a grip on things if I am going to make my deadline of March 14th. I feel like I spend all week trying to offset the weekends mistakes.

On a good note I am almost done with my Christmas shopping. I did all of it online so far. Got to love amazon.com!

My co-worker Karla brought me in an entire shirt box full of home made baked goods today. I will take them home and distribute them to my neighbors while passing them off as my own, I will do the same thing with the HUGE glad ware container my boyfriends mother brought over last night with oatmeal cookies and fudge!

I am kicking my workouts into high gear tomorrow. I will let you know how it goes!!!

Friday, December 11, 2009

Day Four: The Melting Pot

Current Weight Loss...1 lb

I have a birthday dinner to attend tonight for one of my friends at The Melting Pot. If any of you do not know that that is, it's basically a fondue restaurant. The first course involves a cheese fondue, the second a oil or broth based fondue and the third is chocolate...sweet delicious chocolate.

Now going out to dinner when you are trying to loose weight always carries several issues with it. Number one, I have to find something to wear that doesn't make me look fat or ...as fat as I am. Number two, do I partake in the food and call it my 'cheat' day? or do I eat something healthy before I get there? Number three, there is no such thing as going out with my friends and 'not drinking'. We don't know how to be social without cocktails. Who knows, maybe we will all sober up one day and find out that we really don't even like each other.

In trying to keep myself from feeling deprived so that I do not gorge myself on something that I know is not worth the calories my plan is tri-fold.

#1 No Beer, vodka soda with lime will do just fine.
#2 I will have the cheese but with the vegetables instead of the bread and I will limit myself two just a few small pieces of the desert.
#3 I will wear spanx.

Does anyone have any other 'dining-out' ideas to add? I am open to anything and everything.

Day Three: High School Run-Ins

Current Weight Loss-1 lb

I had a nightmare that I ran into people from high school and they didn't recognize me because my face had been so severely distorted from the additional fat I was storing in my cheeks and forehead. I think this dream stems from an underlying fear I have of running into people that I haven't seen in a while and knowing that their first reaction when they see me is "Geesh she's put on weight." I know that this is their reaction because that would be mine if I saw someone who had packed on the pounds. Also I would probably think something a long the lines of..."Wow she let herself go." It is partially this fear that is driving me to drop the pounds.

Yesterday I ate the same things that I did on day one. I went for a run with my dog but it was more like he just ran and pulled me with him. I may or may not have dislocated my shoulder...hyper dog. I know I could have done better with the run. I think I will run in the morning and the afternoons during the week and at least once a day on the weekends. My body needs a pick-me-up big time.

Did you know that if you are on weight-watchers, which I am not currently, that they count sex and masturbating as exercise points? I think that is total bullshit because if that were true then you and I would not be having this conversation right now and I would be tits on a stick. Just some 'food' for thought.

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Day 2: Am I skinny yet?

Current weight loss...0 lbs

So yesterday morning I went with my VERY fit friend to her gym to attend a class called "boot-camp". I used to be pretty athletic but after a good two years of only sporadic exercising, I was questioning my abilities to complete the class. And of course I didn't want her to look down on me because I'm...well...you know...a fat ass.

Not to mention the fact that this gym is already pretty intimidating. I felt out of place with my yoga pants,t-shirt, and camo hat. Yes, my T-shirt did say "shut up and fish" while everyone else was wearing little more than a sports bra and hot pants. Yes I mention this out of jealousy, I have ZERO problems with impropriety if you look like these girls do.

The class starts with 30 minutes of sprint/incline intervals followed by weights for whatever body part they are working out that day. I actually did really well and didn't have to stop. However when the instructor yelled to sprint as fast as we could my treadmill was set to 6.0 while everyone else's was set to 8.0 or higher. Did I mention that I'm only 5'2"? I couldn't see my feet and I'm pretty sure that my legs looked like something out of a speedy gonzalez cartoon. Running at 4.0 miles per hour at an incline of 15 wasn't easy either. But I did it. And I was pretty proud. Maybe a little...too proud.

Unfortunately when I do ANYTHING athletic, especially with someone I know, I let my competitive side rear it's ugly head and I tend to say things to make myself feel better. Like, "Is that all you got?" and "Oh, you're stopping, let me cry for you." These were a couple of my finer moments.

So Jen, if you ever read this, I am sorry, it's a coping mechanism. I call it the Hulk effect. Once my body gets even a little bit of adrenaline or endorphins running through it, I might as well turn into a big green man while I scream and rip off my shirt. In hind sight, I was basically congratulating myself for doing one hour of something that Jen does every day, sometimes twice a day. Foot-in-mouth syndrome seems to be my specialty as of late. In conclusion, I may stick to running and my local gym where I am probably the youngest person there.

Yesterdays food report:
My wonderful boyfriend made me egg beaters with a little bit of diced ham. Breakfast may get boring to report because I essentially eat the same exact thing everyday. I also need a cup of coffee in the morning.

Lunch was a pre made low carb turkey wrap from the supermarket by my office. It was deelish. This brings me to the conclusion that it's probably bad for me in some way.

Dinner was home made low carb low fat beef stroganoff. I used filet, low fat sour cream, and Dijon mustard. It was fantastic. My boyfriend caught me licking the spoon from the pot while I was doing the dishes.
But I had two slices of cheese and a slice of roast beef while I was cooking dinner because I had the jitters pretty bad. Today I will try to avoid this by perhaps having a snack before I leave work.

In conclusion: Yesterday I exercised, acted like an ass, and didn't loose any weight. Oh well, I have 96 days to change that.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

One Chin is Plenty: Day One

Why? Because on chin is plenty.



My name is Tracey. I have a full time job as a sales person for a home builder (Insert ooohhhh's here). Part-time I am working on a novel. That file is currently sitting minimized in the bottom corner of my computer screen. I think it is giving me the evil eye as we speak.



Yes, I know I should be working on that instead of this but I told myself...Self, if you are going to try to loose this extra tonnage of 'happy weight' (in three months) that you have spent two years packing on then you should write about it so at least if nothing else, people can read it and laugh at you. SOMEONE should find amusement in my misery...so here we go.



The idea: Shed 25 pounds by March 14th. This will be done with a combination of exercise, diet, and complaining. Mostly complaining.



Each day I will document what I did (food, exercise, bitching and whining) and how much, if any, weight I lost. I will also post my difficulties along the way and my successes.



So read with me, sneer with me, be sore with me. With you reading and me blogging, we might just have ourselves a good time. Why again am I doing this?...Because one chin is plenty.